SA will not do the Harlem Shake.

I know the person(s) who reads this blog is internet savvy. I can tell by the way you know the difference between a video going viral and being that lunatic in a meeting that says, “Let’s make a viral video.” Since I know you’re internet savvy, I know that you’ve heard of the Harlem Shake and the dozens and dozens of videos that various groups have made and posted to YouTube. Hey, here’s one now!

So after seeing all that, you are obviously asking yourself why Strategic America has not put together a Harlem Shake video of our own. There are many reasons why this won’t happen. There are enough reasons that I feel like I have no choice but to present them to you in list form.

1. We used up all of our good dance moves in the Christmas video we made in 2010.
2. If this video can’t be used to somehow indicate that as a participant, you are much, much busier than everyone else, then a solid 27% of our office would not be interested.
3. As a regular reader of this blog could tell you, if we’re going to make a video of Strategic Americans dancing to a song, it’s going to be this song.
4. Someone might start having fun, so we certainly wouldn’t earn any wellness points for it.
5. The Harlem Shake is getting everyone in trouble.

You see, some passengers asked crew members if they could make a Harlem Shake video during a flight from Colorado to San Diego on February 15. The crew agreed to it, but when the Federal Aviation Administration heard about it, they gave that whole crew the side eye (as one might do if, say, the FAA decided knives are OK on planes again). I guess they consider this kind of thing to be shenanigans and not only frowned on it, they frowned towards it in all the different ways: sideways, from the bottom, over the shoulder, from your mom’s house. The passengers who made the video were students from Colorado College on their way to San Diego for an Ultimate Frisbee tournament. If this is the worst thing those hippies did on the plane, then I think everyone involved got off pretty easy.

[youtube xG6p0z_W2Bo Harlem Shake on a Plane]

Now 15 miners from an Australian gold mine have lost their jobs because the man who owns the mine saw their take on the Harlem Shake (unintentional rhyme). He says it’s because dancing shirtless underground is a safety violation. He even says he’s going to fire the workers who aren’t on camera, but didn’t stop the dancing. It’s like he’s Sarah Jessica Parker’s father in Girls Just Want To Have Fun! Or maybe he’s just mad that they decided to hop on the tail end of this fad and didn’t try to catch the first wave of the next one.

[youtube ynw5eNBDtNw Harlem Shake in a Mine]

I’m not even sure how we could have topped any of that. After the Casual Friday Incident of 2009, shirts are required at all Strategic America company functions (not considered shirts in the SA Employee Handbook: pasties, boobie tassels, tube tops and anything that features the Ed Hardy logo).

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