SA Loves Garbage

Those vests are really flattering.
Those vests are really flattering. Also, these people are not us.

That came out wrong. What I meant was, SA loves giving back to the community through trash collection. You see, tomorrow afternoon, SA is taking it to the streets. More specifically, SA is taking it to the ditch along I-80, just to the south of the building that houses our offices. We’ll be participating in the Adopt-A-Highway program and collecting the trash that has accumulated along the interstate over the summer.

Do you want some facts about Adopt-A-Highway? Boom. Facts.
1. An average of 1,274 groups participate in Iowa’s Adopt-A-Highway program each year. These groups include the Federation of Iowa Insurers, Polk Count Renaissance Fair Enthusiasts and the musical group Color Me Badd.
2. These groups help keep approximately 32 percent of the state’s roadways litter-free. The other 68 percent is professionally cleaned, like my weave.
3. In FY 2011, volunteers collected approximately 512 cubic yards of litter, and state workers collected an additional 3,573 cubic yards from the state’s highways. That’s a lot of tossed-from-a-moving-car dirty diapers.
4. In FY 2011, Iowa DOT employees spent 1,452 hours disposing of trash picked up by Adopt-A-Highway volunteers and an additional 17,829 hours picking up litter from the roadways. That’s almost 743 days – more than two years. They squeezed over two years into one year. That’s magic! This is not.

And because we love research (for real – if we could marry an activity, we would marry research), we logged on to the interwebs to find out what kind of things we should expect to find. Just listen to these treasures: snakes, mice, spiders, guns, a 272-year-old British coin, hub caps, bottles of not-nice liquids, abandoned barrels, animal carcasses, broken automotive batteries and actor George Hamilton. As you know, we’re tough and we’ll be just fine if we encounter any of these items. However, if you happen to be driving by and see one of us being wrestled to the ground by George Hamilton, please call our Human Resource Manager, Marilyn Cox so she can fill out the proper forms.

If you see us in our sexy, state-issued safety vests, give us a honk. Also, please don’t run us over.

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